I decided that while I didn’t mind planes, I hated airports.
I also hated the feeling of dread, the feeling whatever I did would be wrong. Clara was trying to get together as much magical power as she could to try and ward the entire city. She rather thought it had been done once, that there were even patterns in the streets that could help.
I thought that might be an alternative. To me keeping moving, never attached to one place, dragging Kanesha with me into a nomadic lifestyle I knew didn’t really suit her.
And what did I have…oh no. I was not going there.
I was not running away. So, what was I running towards? Was I letting chance guide me to the west coast?
I knew where she was going. Kanesha I could protect simply by keeping her close to me. I’d already proved I couldn’t, yet, protect an entire city, not from a fire giant king. Not from somebody who’s power was so close to mine and yet so much more powerful.
Allies in Jotunheim. Angrboda. But I knew if…if she was capable of taking on Surtur directly, would she?
Probably not. She had no real reason to care.
And then there were the dwarfmaid twins. Maybe they could help, somehow.
If it came to war, they would.
If it came to war, I rather thought I would already have failed. Even if part of me wouldn’t mind it.
Part of me rather thought it would be fun. My father’s influence? No, he was a trickster, not a fighter.
But there was a part of me that seemed to stir at the thought of leading an army. I rolled my eyes. I did not want to be a queen. I did not want to be a general.
And then there was that feeling of a connection between me and Surtur. Thruor was right. It was hate. An enemy could be as connected as a lover.
He wanted to make us both.
And there was power in that, I realized. Power in a bond formed in such a way…but I would not allow myself to be used.
For the power would go only to the one who intended the bond to form. Not my task to kill him.
I wondered if fate would mind…
…no, that was hate too. And I understood why mother had said to leave.
To avoid the confrontation until I had calmed down enough that it would not be based off of hate.